Wisdom from Brian Mavis on How to Help the People of Moore, Oklahoma

A devastating tornado hit our town the month before I moved here in 2008.  That’s when I first met Brian Mavis. Brian Mavis is on staff at LifeBridge Christian Church in Longmont, Colorado. He mobilized Christians all around the country, and in this area, to serve the people of Windsor, Colorado. He understands how best we can help when tragedy strikes.

Here are his thoughts on how we can best help the people of Moore, Oklahoma (This post was originally written after the tornado in Joplin, MO. but was changed by Brian to address the tragedy in Moore, OK. Here’s the original post: 3 Do’s & Don’ts):

Many of you and your churches want to help the people of Moore, Oklahoma, but you aren’t sure what to do. Here are some lessons I’ve learned in dealing with natural disasters (e.g. my home town of Windsor, CO had an EF-5 tornado in 2008, and my church has sent dozens of groups to Joplin since their tornado).Let’s start with the Hippocratic Oath, “First, do no harm” and look at two things not to do:1. Don’t Send Clothes, Toys, or Furniture
…
The US is the most over-clothed country in the world. Soon, there will be trucks sent to Moore by well-meaning churches, filled with clothes, toys, and furniture. There is no place to put the furniture now, and Moore will get way too many clothes and toys.2. Don’t Send a Team of Volunteers without a Local Organization Giving You Guidance

Don’t go to Moore uninvited. FEMA representatives always fear that if a town doesn’t get a handle on all the uninvited volunteers, they will end up with a bigger crisis than the one caused by the tornado. Coordinate with a local Moore organization before sending a team of volunteers and make sure your being there is of more benefit to them than work.

Now let’s look at three things you and your church can do to help Moore.

1. Pray for the Affected and those Ministering to Them

During the next few weeks, many who lost homes and loved ones will see their grief turn to frustration and anger—at their circumstances, at the government, at the insurance companies, and at God. Pray for them now and then. Also, don’t forget to pray for those who are ministering to them. They are caring a heavy load, and they will need spiritual, emotional, and physical strength to endure it.

2. Forge Contacts with Reputable Organizations

Disasters like these bring out the sheep and the wolves in sheep’s clothing. Work with people and groups you can trust. You can send money to the Red Cross, but you may prefer to work directly with a church in the Moore area that you know and can rely on. Start with the relationships you already have.

3. Make a Long-Term Commitment with Your Short-Term Trips

After a disaster like this, the devastated area goes through three stages:

Relief
Recovery
Rebuilding

Ironically the need for volunteers is inverse to what the area experiences. Normally a lot of people want to volunteer at first, but that is when the professionals (police, fire, EMT’s, gas and electric workers, etc.) are needed and not volunteers. Then when many volunteers are needed for things like hanging siding, installing lawns, planting trees, painting, and so on, the interest in helping subsides. Begin planning how you can help Moore this fall, at Christmas and next summer.

Some people may ask you about Moore and ask, “Where was God?” You can tell them, “He is in the recovery.” Come and join him.

6 Manifestations of Collective Christian Inner Angst (aka “How to Avoid the Tossing of Molotov Cocktails at a Hillsong Concert”)

Recently, I went to a Hillsong concert with about 30 people from my church and witnessed a uniquely human experience that ended up also being uniquely Christian.Leave horses or cows alone in a field all day and it doesn’t happen.My cat is at home all by herself most days and she doesn’t do it.Last Spring, I spent quite a while at the lion exhibit and they never exhibited the behavior I’ve found unique to humans.

Put humans in a silent room, with no agenda, and it will eventually happen.

I’ll go ahead and tell you that I think it happens because we are uncomfortable with silence.

So, Hillsong was an hour late so…there we sat, 3,000 Christian humans in a large room with no agenda and a silence that became so unbearable for a group of Christians at the front and left of the room that they did the thing that we humans do when we are in groups in rooms with no agenda humans: They filled the silence with noise.

And here’s how it progressed and how it always progresses and–specifically–how it always progresses when the large group of uncomfortable humans are Christian.

Six Manifestations of Collective Christian Inner Angst

Manifestation One: Clapping in Unison
Someone started clapping and before we all knew it we were all clapping in unison. Clap, clap, clap….

Manifestation Two: Clapping in Unison More Quickly
Yes, clapping together wasn’t enough. Something within us drove us to start clapping so quickly that we had to eventually stop because we couldn’t keep up the pace. At this point, a chuckle to oneself is irrepressible.

Manifestation Three: The Wave
After a few rounds of clapping in unison and clapping in unison more quickly no longer satisfied our collective inner angst we were forced to endure because of Hillsong’s tardiness, we embraced the next manifestation of our inability to cope with unscheduled inactivity and silence: The Wave.

Manifestation Four: The “We love Jesus” Cheer
But, The Wave served only as a brief and momentary physical relief for the building, but albeit, still joyful inner frustration of the Saintly crowd with the unexpected concert delay, so began the next iteration of our collective inner angst: The “We love Jesus, yes we do. We love Jesus, how ’bout you?” cheer.

Now, as it so happened, Hillsong took the stage halfway through the fifth round of the “We love Jesus” cheer, so the next two stages were avoided–and usually are with the intervention of a reasonable person–but I share them as a warning to what I’m afraid will inevitably happen if collective inner angst is allowed to manifest itself unabated.

Manifestation Five: Booing
Based on what I experienced in the Denver Convention Center before that Hillsong Concert, I’m confident that–if Hillsong had not taken the stage when they did–the “Boo-birds” would have been released throughout the Denver Convention Center. Which, I’m also sure, would have invariably led to the next and terminal manifestation of collective Christian Inner Angst….the rarely observed but always destructive tossing of Molotov Cocktails.

Manifestation Six: Molotov Cocktails
Please know that this manifestation, although it seems “right” and “justifiable” at the time, serves only to harm our witness in the community and should be avoided at all cost.

My suggestion is, when you feel the urge to fill your empty Coke bottle with fuel, put a fuse in it, and put a match to it, you simply need to just set the bottle down and start clapping and you’re sure to feel much better.

Or, better yet, quote this scripture to yourself, “Be still and know that He is God.” (Psalm 46:10)

That’s the power of sound theology: it has the power to save you and others from a fiery death at a Hillsong concert in Denver.

©2013 Arron Chambers

Putting the “Miss” in “Mistake”

I’ve been on a good run recently of making bad mistakes.

In the past week…

I’ve been insensitive.

I’ve been selfish.

I’ve been a jerk.

I’ve missed the mark by missing opportunities to do things well.

Let me give you a few of the highlights, or lowlights…depending on your perspective, of how I “missed the mark” and put the “Miss” in “Mistake.”

• I sent an angry email without waiting 24 hours to ensure that, sending the email, was really a good idea and the wise thing to do. It wasn’t.
• I assumed something about somebody that wasn’t true.
• I used the “pulpit” of my church as a “bully pulpit” to say something to a group of people that would have been better said to them one-on-one and face-to-face, or not said at all.
• I forgot that my ministry is not all about me.
• I took someone’s differing opinion as a personal attack.
• I forgot the importance of seeking to understand before seeking to be understood.
• I shared a disagreement I had with a decision by one of my teammates publicly (in a meeting) without first sharing it with him privately.
• I made a joke at someone else’s expense.
• I didn’t respond to an email request in a timely manner because I was “too busy to deal with it now” and missed an opportunity to bless someone else.
• Someone made a significant personal sacrifice for me and I neglected to thank him in a timely manner.
• While someone was speaking with me, I allowed myself to be distracted by someone over his shoulder, and abruptly cut the conversation short to go across the room and talk to the other person. That was so rude.
• My son asked me to pray with him before he went to sleep, I said, “I’m on my way” but went on to check a few more emails and, by the time I made it downstairs, he was already asleep. I’m so sorry, Sylas.
• I left a huge mess in the floor of our bedroom and just expected my wife to clean it up…as if that was her job…which it isn’t.  Sorry Babe. I forgot that we’re a team.
• I’m sitting here writing this blog post while my wife is in the kitchen making school lunches for all the kids. What am I doing?!? The irony of this situation is suffocating! I’ll be back! (She was done, so I shoveled the snow off the driveway, so I think we’re cool.  Cool…get it? No, you don’t live in Colorado, so I’m sure you don’t “get” being cool in late April.)
• Someone invited me, by email, to join their professional network on LinkedIn and I put their email request in the trash file.

Actually, that last one is one of the few things I did right in the past week.

Confession IS Good for the Soul

I just finished talking with a man who is in the process of recovery from sexual sin. As he told me about the freedom he has found in confession, a memory carried me back to a gravel road on the Navy Base in Orlando, Florida.

One day, in elementary school, I fell off my bike while racing down a gravel road, opening several large wounds on the left side of my body.  It took about an hour for my friend Matt’s mom to clean the dirt and gravel out of those wounds.  It hurt, but I knew it was the best thing to do.

The next morning I had a soccer game.  My wounds were bandaged and somewhat forgotten until I slid in the dirt to kick the ball, ripping off the bandages and filling every wound once again with dirt.  I went to the sideline and recovered my dirty wounds with fresh bandages and I continued to play the game.

After the game my Dad took me out to the picnic table in the back yard.  Slowly and carefully Dad removed each bandage exposing my dirty wounds to the air.  Once my wounds were exposed he began to clean my wounds.  Each wound was covered in dirt.  I cried as my Dad scrubbed away the dirt exposing the raw and painful wounds.  The pain was excruciating.  To this day I can still hear my Dad whispering, “I’m so sorry, son.  I know this hurts, but your wounds won’t heal properly unless I get all of the dirt out.”  I made myself vulnerable to my Dad because I knew that he had the best intentions.  I endured the pain because I wanted to be healed.  Hurt was the price I paid for healing.

Some of us are walking around with wounds that will not heal simply because—out of the fear of pain—we refuse to reveal them to ANYONE.  And because we refuse to reveal them, they have not been healed.  God’s word clearly teaches us that there is healing found in authenticity to both God and people.

In 1 John 1:8, 9 we read, “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (italics mine).  Now confessing our “sins” to God may not be a pleasant experience.  In fact it may be a very painful ordeal, but John clearly teaches us that only in authenticity with God do we find forgiveness and purification.

In James 5:16 we read, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed” (italics mine).  I’m pretty positive that confessing our “sins” to each other may also not be a pleasant experience.  In fact, I’m pretty sure that it might be a very, very painful and risky ordeal, but James clearly teaches us that only in authenticity with each other do we find true healing.

 

Why Fishing is Not a Waste of Time

I’ve always enjoyed fishing.  Some of my favorite childhood memories are of fishing with my Dad, my Grandpa Chambers, and my Uncle Don Lewis.

You can learn a lot of important life-lessons with a fishing pole or net in your hand.

I was reminded of that while studying for a sermon on Peter.

When Jesus meets Peter, He (Peter) was already an accomplished fisherman.  He’d been fishing for many years and those years had not been a waste of time.  To the contrary, those years of fishing for fish had prepared Peter for years of fishing for souls.  All of those years of nets, storms, casting, mending, and gutting fish served to prepare Peter for the next thing God had planned for him to do.

While fishing . . .

1)    Peter was learning the importance of hard work.

Fishing in the 1st century was extremely hard work. Peter was not fishing for fun; he was fishing for finances and food, so he worked hard at it, all the while–and unknowingly–developing a work ethic that would serve to carry both him and the Gospel from the shores of the Sea of Galilee around the world.

2)    Peter was learning the importance of patience.

Herb Shriner said, “All you need to be a fisherman is patience and a worm.”  While fishing, one will sometimes sit all day without as much as a nibble on the line, but a true fisherman keeps coming back–pole in hand–because he knows “no nibbles” doesn’t mean “no fish”–it just means “not today.”

During those long days and nights when Peter wasn’t catching any fish, he was learning to wait upon the Lord to fill the nets at just the right time.

3)    Peter was learning the importance of having a strategy.

An article from NetBible on fishing in the 1st Century details the strategy required to catch fish with a cast net: “A circular net, with small meshes and leaded around the edge, is cast from the shore into the shallow water in such a manner that the leaded edge forms the base of a cone, the apex being formed by the fisherman holding the center of the net in his hand. The cone thus formed encloses such fish as cannot escape the quick throw of the fisher.”

Catching fish with a net or a pole requires strategy.  One must use the right equipment, the right bait, pick the right location, and all at the right time.

While fishing, Peter was learning the importance of thinking and working strategically to “catch” men and women with the Gospel.

4)    Peter was learning the importance of working with a team.

Studies of fishing in the 1st Century reveal that it took from five to ten men to work a fishing net on the Sea of Galilee.  Team work was essential for successful net fishing from a boat.

It’s obvious from how Peter depended on the Church for prayer and support that the lessons he learned on the water about the importance of teamwork kept him afloat in his ministry to and with the Church.

You see, Peter wasn’t wasting time when he was fishing for all those years before the call; he was preparing to do what God was going to call him to do.

—-

Whatever you’re doing now, do it with the awareness that God can use whatever you’re experiencing now to do–more effectively–whatever He calls you to do.

No, you’re not wasting time; you’re preparing to catch some fish.

5 Key Elements for Building a Strong Team

I was just being interviewed on a radio show called GirlFriendIt and ran out of time as I was working my way through this list.  They asked me to post the list on my blog.

Here you go.

5 Key Elements for Building a Strong Team

Enlisting–Build a strong team by recruiting, interviewing, training, and leading well and then bring your team along with you on the journey. A truly strong leader does not surround himself/herself with “weaker” leaders, but with strong men and women.  The insecure leader will not intentionally hire or retain team-members by whom he/she feels threatened, but will consciously or unconsciously hire team members who he/she sees as slightly inferior.  Building a strong team requires building the team with strong members.

 

Entrusting–Do you naturally trust people? Some leaders have allowed past pain to take root and grow in their soul in a way that chokes the life out of trust.  This leader assumes that his/her team-members need to be checked on, watched, and supervised in a way that ensures their loyalty to both the institution and the leader.  I’ve experienced this and found it to be an environment toxic to creativity, enthusiasm, and joy in ministry.  Strong leaders don’t make their team-members earn their trust–it’s given upon arrival. It can be lost, but not at the front door.

 

 

Equipping–It is incredibly frustrating to be given total responsibility while also to be given minimal resources and training.  I think it’s important for leaders to take personal responsibility for the individual success of his/her team-members by intentionally equipping the team-members with the resources and training they need to be best positioned for success. Strong leaders routinely ask their staff, “What can I do to support you in your ministry?,” listen, and then respond supportively.

 

Empowering–As frustrating as it is to have total responsibility while also having minimal resources and training, it’s a gazillion (give or take a zillion) times more frustrating to be given total responsibility while also to be given minimal authority.  Weak leaders are prone to micromanagement, but strong leaders empower their team with both the responsibility and the authority to lead well.

 

Encouraging–Recently, a ministry leader pointed out that I had not encouraged a few of the ministry leaders recently and he was right.  I felt terrible because I truly value those leaders, but had not said it recently and–in so doing–had created a vacuum in their hearts that discouragement was glad to fill.  It was a reminder to me that strong leaders encourage regularly and specifically. I believe it’s important not just to encourage my team-members on a regular basis (not mechanically, but organically), but it’s also important to be as specific as possible with my encouragement.  So, instead of saying, “Tammy, Uptown worship was great this week,” I say, “Tammy, I loved how you presented that lesson on serving one another. I’ve never thought about it that way, but your application of the story of the Good Samaritan was so very insightful. Thanks!”

Top 10 Things That Can Drain Your Preacher

I asked my friends on Facebook to give me the top things that drain their ministry.  I got a lot of good responses, so I decided to put together a list of the top 10 things that can drain your preacher.

10 Drainers*

1. When, after a sermon, someone from the congregation asks, “May I give you some constructive criticism?”
2. When, at a board meeting, a deacon says, “Let me play the Devil’s advocate.”
3. EGR’s: Extra Grace Required People.
4. Having to see your salary posted on the wall outside your office when you know that every other Elder and Deacon makes twice as much as you do and thinks that you are overpaid.
5. When someone approaches you and says, “The Lord told me to tell you…”
6. When, after a speaking engagement, someone hands you a check and says, “I hope this is enough.” For the record: This is a no win situation because if the guest speaker looks at his $50 check for delivering 3 sermons, a lesson, and preparing a small group lesson for a weekend church retreat and says, “No, that’s not enough,” you’re liable to immediately judge him as a preacher who is only in it for the money, but if he looks at it and says, “Sure, it’s enough,” you’ve forced him into a situation where he may have to be dishonest to not appear to be greedy. Just pay your guest speaker enough to cover his expenses, to recognize the value of his time with you and the time away from his family, and the amount of work it took to prepare for the event and I’m sure it will be enough.
7. When someone walks into your office without knocking or checking with your Administrative Assistant, sits down, and asks, “Preacher, you have a moment to talk?”
8. Those people in the church who turn every conversation into a benevolence request.
9. When you do a wedding for a young couple and they pay the DJ $1000, the photographer $1500, spend $500 for the cake, $5000 for the reception hall, $1000 on flowers, $2000 on a dress, but—a month after the wedding—send you a $25 gift card to Golden Corral as payment for doing their wedding.
10. When someone uses the Prayer Request Card to deliver a harsh and anonymous criticism.

What would you add to the list?

*Disclaimer: None of these reflect the actual experiences of the author of this blog. Any similarity to any church leaders or church members real and alive in this world is purely coincidental…and the result of this blog post being written with an EGR looking through the author’s office door window while knocking and waving a benevolence request form back and forth ensuring that the author of this blog post will be late for his dinner date with his wife to Golden Corral. 

Technology–A Blessing or a Curse?

Technology is a blessing and a curse.

I’m on Facebook, Twitter, I have a blog, and I’m on Pinterest.

And, before you ask me to give up my man-card, you may want to hear the recipe for cinnamon roll waffles I picked up on Pinterest the other day.

Why have I embraced technology?

I want to stay connected with my friends, my congregation, my children, my extended family, and with my culture.

For example, here’s how I use Facebook as a ministry tool:

1) Keeping in touch with people in the church.

2) I’ve found it’s great for use as focus group (help with sermons). I routinely ask questions like, “What’s your biggest fear?”, “What drains you?”, and “What did you want to be when you grew up?” and use the results in my sermons.

3) Encouragement. I use it to offer encouragement to people in my congregation.

4) Shepherding. More than a few times, I’ve found out about a need or a crisis from Facebook. I can then follow up immediately with them.

5) Keeping informed.  Facebook helps me to better know what is going on in the lives of people in my congregation.  It’s common for me to comment to people on Sundays about something I read about on Facebook.  This is not always good. I have also discovered things about members…like what they like to do in Vegas, how they look in a bikini, and where they put that tattoo they got while drunk one night in college …about which I’d rather not have known.

6) Prayer prompter. Almost every day, I’m prompted to pray for someone about something they shared on Facebook.  Even today, I’ve already let about 4 people know that I’ll be praying for them today.

7) Outreach. I use technology to maintain and build relationships with my non-Christian friends because I care about them and hope they one day know how much Jesus cares about them.

8) Promoting church events.

9) Help people to get to know me, which can be both good and bad…but hopefully, mostly good.

All that being said, technology can drain us and keep us from being effective.

1. Create boundaries for your use of technology at home.

There should be times and places when you’re not on your smart phone, checking emails, or updating your status.

If you love to tweet I’d recommend things like TweetDeck that allow you to set up all your tweets conveniently.

2. Create boundaries for your use of technology at work.

It’s rude to be texting while someone is talking to you in the church lobby.

It’s ineffective to not be present in a meeting because you are present on the internet.

3. Turn off your phone when you need to “be where the bein’ is.”

I typically turn off my phone at 9 at night and on Sunday afternoons.  I tell people in the church that, if they need me, they can always knock on my door.

We’re really not that important.

When I see a preacher who feels like he needs to be accessible to his people  24/7; I see an insecure man who needs his people more than they need him.

4. Don’t start measuring your value to the Kingdom by how many followers you have on Twitter or friends on Facebook.

I heard Perry Noble share that he took a picture of his daughter and she asked him, “Dad, will you please not put that on Twitter? Let’s just keep it a Daddy and daughter thing.” He said that was a wake-up-call.

5. Turn off your email when you’re on vacation.

6. Don’t text anyone of the opposite sex but your spouse or coworkers.

Of all the couples I’m working with who are trying to survive an extra-marital affair, every one started with texting.

Florida Bible Conference

I’m so excited to be speaking at the Florida Bible Conference in Central Florida next week. If you’re in the area, I encourage you to come for at least one of the sessions.  There are some amazing speakers on the program.  If you’ve never heard Glenn Bourne or Jim Smith, you’ve missed out on a huge blessing.

Hope to see you there!

Are You Truly Living?

The Gospel of John records that Jesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10). In other words, Christ says that He wants us to have “life—in abundance.” He wants our tanks full of life, life, and more life spilling over us, through us, and out of us.

The Apostle John loved life. He used a form of the word life sixty-nine times in his gospel. He was not alone in this passion. Luke talked about life thirty-two times, Matthew twenty-nine times, and Mark thirteen times.

John, however, talked about life more than twice as much as any one of the other Gospel writers. Why was he obsessed with life? We know that he was one of Jesus’ closest friends—so close that while on the cross, Jesus entrusted John with the care of his mother.

I think John was obsessed with life lived in abundance because he walked with the very source of life for more than three years.

I read that every person over the age of thirty-three is obsessed with death. Death will inevitably arrive for each of us, but first we must live.

I want to be obsessed with life.

Jesus was and is obsessed with life. He didn’t come so that our lives would be busy. He came so that our lives would be full.

I want to have an abundant life—as Jesus defined it. And I want the same for you.

One of my favorite movies is Braveheart. It is the story of a Scottish rebel, William Wallace, who led an uprising against the cruel English ruler Edward the Longshanks who wanted the crown of Scotland for himself. In the movie, after Wallace’s wife is killed he begins a long quest to make Scotland free once and for all. Near the end of the movie, Wallace is visited in his prison cell by the daughter of the king, who has grown to like him. He is to be executed and she enters his cell to beg him to confess and swear allegiance to the King of England. Wallace will not compromise; he will not surrender. The princess, knowing there is no hope for Wallace unless he confesses, says, “You will die! It will be awful!” To which Wallace replies, “All men die, but not all men truly live.”

That quote leaves me feeling both convicted and motivated. Conviction comes when we ask ourselves, Am I truly living? Motivation comes when we embrace the conviction our answer brings.

Are we truly living? We get up; brush our teeth; hug our kids; and go to work, school, or to the couch. We inhale and exhale shallow, safe breaths. We pay our bills. We confront a multitude of stimuli throughout the day. But is this living?

Are you really living?